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Wednesday, January 14th, 2009
2:17 am - ...

Can you help me? Where can I download the works by Thompson or Wolfe?
Thank you.

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Sunday, October 2nd, 2005
1:47 pm - The Gonzo Press is online


In other words go look at this-

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Monday, July 11th, 2005
9:21 pm - The Gonzo Press

I am launching "The Gonzo Press.com" on 10/1/05. I'm currently looking for readers and writers... take a gander at our community to find out more...




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Monday, February 28th, 2005
4:08 pm - Cross posted/ Eulogy

Well I found an editor with enough balls to run my eulogy...


Oh and the other night I was hanging out getting loaded with friends and I said "Life has never gotten to weird for me but it has gotten lame" which they all agree with...

Tom Luffman

current mood: drunk

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Thursday, February 24th, 2005
12:15 am - Cruel Meat-Hook Realities

First of all, you all (the reading audience) should know, is that I am writing this from a notebook that I wrote the following piece: as I am typing this onto an electronic format I am drinking a beverage consisting of mostly Mountain Dew: Code Red.

* * * * *

I am writing this article on the #84 Bus, surrounded by poor people with various smells and various teeth missing. Before I get to the crux of this text, let me give you all some background first: it will help explain my current mood and state of mind, at least I hope it does...

* * * * *

The trip to and back from Fullerton, although packed in the back of a van, was enjoyable. While the CSUS college bowl team, of which I am part of, came in fifth at the regional tournament out of eleven schools; we believed, on that Saturday night (Feb. 19th), as some of us went out to party in Universal City with some students from the University of Hawaii, that we had gone our best, giving a good effort fighting the good fight to bring honor and glory to our school. That night I had about 4 ½ Beers, 2 or 3 raspberry-flavored "Smirnoff Twists," and about three Singapore Slings (a type of mixed drink). Later, somehow, we ended up in a dance club, the "Off Campus Pub," that’s the name of the place, right near the Marriott hotel where both our teams were staying. A good place indeed to end the night.

The next day we came back to Sacramento, in various states of hangover-ness... I was Ok, of course, with only a very low and slight headache. I took some Bayer Aspirin and some Jolt Cola, and what Beer remained in my hotel room. It seemed to work. As with the trip down there on the 18th, on the trip back on the 20th, I was reading my copy of "The Great Shark Hunt" a book consisting of a collection of articles written by my favorite contemporary author in the whole world, the good doctor of journalism himself, Hunter S. Thompson.

I got home around 5:30 pm (we all had left Fullerton and the whole L.A. scene around 9:00 am), hung out at the local mall (Arden Fair) for a few hours, combating fatigue, went back home and literally crashed.. that is, I fell into a deep sleep. Around 1:30 am, I awoke and began the arduous task of sifting though all the E-mail that I had neglected. At about 2:15 am, I clicked on the link to Yahoo.Com, so as to learn about what was going on in the rest of the world. That’s when I found out.

* * * * * *

Sometime on that same wretched Sunday night as I came home and was surfing the web, my favorite writer Hunter Thompson had apparently taken one of his many guns to his head and literally blew his mind. I was then, and am now still just coming out of the shock of learning all this... so yes, I feel somewhat down and sad, that is only natural, is it not? After all, was I not one of his books only hours before? Seeing his name in the headlines like that was the LAST THING that I would have ever expected.

One may thing that I would go on some kind of drinking spree to numb the pain and sadness in my heart, and maybe if it had been any else that may have been true; but in all savage brute honesty I am too saddened to drink anything stronger than Root Beer for now.

What will I do now? I truly I don’t know for sure. Perhaps I may enter the wild world of student politics, I hear from various underground sources that there is an election soon. I want to help others, people in particular, and maybe this is the way that I can be best able to do just that. If elected (to whatever office i happen to run for), I will listen to any concern that my fellow students may have, and will not merely just give lip service to their needs as those other professional student politicians are prone to do. I will do whatever I can to do what is right, fair, and square by fellow students. I AM ONE OF YOU, and not just another political junkie.

current mood: gloomy

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Sunday, February 20th, 2005
9:43 pm

RIP, Doc.


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Monday, March 15th, 2004
6:45 am - Snorted some cocaine under the table at Barnes & Noble


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Friday, January 9th, 2004
11:26 pm

Link to JDeppLayouts
I would like to introduce a re-opened Johnny Depp Layouts Community. Here you would be able to share your Johnny Depp graphics, layouts, and icons. Also, you would have a place to socialize with other Johnny Deppers. Make sure that you take advantage of this wonderful opportunity to join! Click the picture above to join.

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Tuesday, September 9th, 2003
2:32 pm - where were you when the fun stopped

the good doctor is once again working on a major film production "the rum diary" directed by benicio del toro comes out in 2004 check it out.

current mood: amused

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Saturday, June 14th, 2003
5:32 pm
vivalamande I haven't posted anything as of yet, so I guess there is no time like the present.

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Thursday, June 12th, 2003
7:23 pm - George Washington's Wooden Teeth

It has been noted by numerous historians as being ironic the fact that George
Washington, the man credited with being the "Father of our Country", has
fathered not a single child. Alas it is less known and not at all ironic the
fact that George Washington's wooden teeth had had more sexual relations than
the nation's first president himself. It is from the teeth's raucous rampages
that the sexual euphemism "wood" comes from. With an ingrained mastery of
flirtation the teeth kindled the passions of women like a dry log in the

The teeth could be credited with being the most liberal lovers of their time and
age. The race of the opposite sex played no role in their choosing of a nightly
suitor. Nor did other such trivial factors come into play. The teeth cared not
if their sex partner (or partners) for the night was white or black or oriental
or eskimo. Nor did they care if they were young or old, dead or living. In fact,
the only thing that mattered to the teeth was a hole. If something didn't have a
hole the teeth wouldn't touch it. However, if something was in fact endowed with
an orifice, or better yet, multiple orifices, it was quite frankly "fair game".

The teeth were expert seducers. Within minutes they'd have females laying
prostrate on the floor all set to make love to the piney dentures. Obviously
this was much more easier to do with dead women but embalming fluid has not been
invented yet and the rapid decomposition of tissues had ruined many an orgy.

It must be mentioned here that the teeth were the pioneers of pickup lines.
They've thought up such classics as "Baby, can I nibble on your clit?" and "Have
you ever been fucked by some molars before?" They spoke such lines in a variety
of languages such as English, Spanish, Italian, and that everlasting language of
love - Chinese. The teeth were also quite erudite in the tongues of long lost
civilizations. They were fluent in the speech of the Ancient Greeks, the
Azteks, the Atlanteans, and the Smurfs. Knowledge of the latter was especially
useful to the teeth during their wooing of that famed blue skinned lilliputian,

The teeth were suave, educated, and also kind. Especially to the handicapped. In
one very well documented occurence, the teeth engaged in a love affair with a
blind woman named Betsy. Betsy was blind in both eyes, the result of a wild
grizzly "penising" her eyes. For a good part of her life Betsy had lived with
glass spheres for eyes as a result of this gruesome incident. None the less, the
teeth proceeded to seduce her, remove her glass eyes, and fuck her in her eye
sockets. Betsy told all in her memoirs "Bear Fucked Betsy, or How I Learned To
Stop Worrying And Got Fucked In My Eye Holes".

Forbidden love was also known to the teeth who had their own "monkey on a
chain". This "monkey on a chain" was a three titted male chimpanzee that the
teeth kept around for those rare nights when love did not approach their
bicuspid selves. They would do... unmentionable things to that simian. Still, it
was all done out of love. And desperation. Also, lots of lube was used.

However, the teeth's sexual flame began to wither away in their later years.
Towards the end of the teeth's long and sticky life even the deceased refused
their advances. It was from such unfortunate but common occurrences that the
phrase "turning over in one's grave" comes from. 'Twas a sad end for the teeth's
sexual savantry.

Still, their legacy lives on. The teeth will always be remembered. Matters it
not if all records and memories of them will slowly degrade and disappear for
the teeth will live on in a different kind of memory. Genetic memory. For you
see, George Washington's wooden teeth were directly responsible for the birth of
over half this country's inhabitants. Most American families can trace their
ancestry to those wooden dentures, those harbingers of hedonism, those true
fathers of our country, those teeth.

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2:28 am - I am the other guy who runs this popsicle stand...

Please read it if you want... but you don't have to. It's just a screenplay depicting my life story. Pretty long too... but worth a gander.

A script I am working on...Collapse )

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Wednesday, June 4th, 2003
4:39 pm

so this is the first post. well here we go, i wrote this after my latest heartbreak...there are things wrong with it i know, but i want your opinion....so go read it already

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